One Last Letter.

You asked me what it was I wanted from you, and I said respect. You admitted that you didn’t know how to give it, and I was only able to weakly navigate some sort of example, but I think I have a more firm understanding now. Let me explain.

What I’ve desired most in this process is to see you make good choices. As much as I’ve wanted to be able to finish healing, I’ve wanted more to see you do something different from the poor pattern you’ve fallen so deeply into. I want to know that I mattered; that I matter. That it wasn’t some game to you, that it was real and that because of it, things are different. Show me what you’ve learned from us, or at least since us; prove to me that it wasn’t a waste of time. Show me that you’ve matured and that no one else will have to endure the same pain I am because of you.  I guess that’s what respect looks like to me. That’s what I really want. And truthfully, after talking to you, I’m confident that you’ll be able to do it.

I can clearly see that you’re still afraid of me falling in love with you again, or maybe that I haven’t fallen out yet, and I guess I can’t blame you, but do us all a favor: don’t worry about me. I won’t be in your way any longer. I hope this song speaks to you:

Thanks again for everything. Farewell, dear. Our Lord’s blessings be with you.

(P.S.- Sorry about the long goodbye, I know how much you hate them, but I kinda needed it though, hope you understand.)

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