I didn’t stop to think about it at the time, but I nearly died today. I fell asleep while driving home early this morning, drifted into the center divider. I snapped awake right before I hit, so I was able avoid slamming into it, but when I swerved, it clipped my new tire and left it punctured.
(I only had it for a month!) Reluctantly, pulled off of the freeway and ended up having to change my tire in the dark and the rain.
Honestly, I was frustrated. I should’ve taken a nap before driving, but I was impatient. The accident happened in the fast lane right past the exit I should’ve taken to go home, and the tire that was shredded was a brand new tire that I’d spent almost $100 on and had for one month.
When I walked into the house, my roommate was up getting ready to go to work. When I told him what happened, his first words were, “I’m so glad you’re okay.” That sounded weird to me, I wasn’t glad I was okay, I was mad that the whole thing happened.
“The tire is nothing, you could’ve gotten hurt.”
I hadn’t considered that. He was right though. His words sank in as I laid down to rest.
When I went to get a used tire this morning, I met an older Mexican gentleman named Andy. He reminded me of how fortunate I was as he told me stories of growing up in the west side of Long Beach one street away from Snoop, joining the army at 19, and later becoming a police officer. He told me how he was one of 3 childhood friends that made it out of LB alive and how the other 9 lost their lives. He told me stories of his near-death experiences and how he knew that God definitely had him alive for a reason.
As we waited for the owner to get there, he pressed in a little more strongly, telling me that I could’ve died this morning, so God still wants to use me too.
That was sobering.
I hadn’t even thought about that. I was still stuck on all the money I had thrown away in all of this. I listened in measures, weighing each word of what he said: I thought about Eboni and how upset she would have been. I thought of my family, my mom scolding me for my foolishness, my dad and my brother bearing it silently: all three of them hurting.
I realized just how big of a deal the entire situation was and finally understood how much I had to be thankful for.
I ended up being late to work today, but God needed to sit me down and give me some straight talk. I think I understand now though, even after reading some comments people left me on Instagram: My life is too valuable to be tripping off of being impatient, or over the price of a tire, or even to be more concerned about how I feel at the moment rather than what I need to do. I know that this is only a beginning for me, but I’m thankful for it and I value it more than I have ever valued it before.
Glory to God for concerning Himself with my life when I was only concerned with my tire. I still have a lot of perspective to learn from Him.