#20 [All Things New.]

I have made myself a fornicator:

Called my body my own
And did with it as I wished;

I have been forgetful.
I forgot the Master that crafted it
I forgot the price paid
I am not cheap.

I’ve forgotten these things.

He commands that my body be a living sacrifice
Kenshin is to devote or give life
I’m shamed by my own name…
Tenrai reminds me that God writes,
Not I
That’s why
I’m a King.
Though my slave chains have been broken for years
I’m sometimes still trying to find them
I like them.
I like to pretend they were made for me
That these hands and feet can’t change their fate
That it’s okay to fall in the same traps different ways

It’s progress, right?

Like walking backwards is moving forward

Who are we fooling?

Each of us is playing the same game
We flirt with flames
Afraid to walk away,
To pay for the better way.
We lust for easy.

I understand,
It’s me too.

You are brave.
Courageous, strong, smart, and well on your way to success
Fix your eyes on your treasure,
Don’t look right or left
Chase that greatness.
It seems small
But God is making

Even you.

No matter how much things seem a mess,
This’ll be for the best,
Keep pressing.
You are blessed to be injured in the name of righteousness
Embrace the pain.
Let it train your mind to find the way that’s true
Let eagle’s wings sprout from your spine;
It’s time you learn to fly

Let your hammering heartbeat
Orchestrate victories,
Let each deep breath be a fanfare,
Your feet stepping forward at the tempo of sixteenth notes.
May your body morph into symphonies of purity and justice
May the strength of holiness crown your head
And may each temptation that stands to face you be naught but grains of sand before your windstorms.

May we be grains of sand before your windstorms.

Live your life with the might to blow us away.
And when that dust fades, nothing will be the same.
Everything is becoming new.

#11 [First Month of a Marathon.]

I’ve been so afraid of drowning in you
That these deep breaths you’ve taught me involuntarily
scare me.
I’ve fought against these chains for so long
I’m shocked I’ve become so free!
In one month:
I’ve learned to drink deeply from the unceasing oceans in your eyes.
I’ve internalized your cadence so strongly my heartbeat writes it on silence.
You’ve built a home for me in those arms;
I never thought my wanderlust would so easily leave me…

I’ve explored each of your mountains of wisdom and your transparent brooks
Each of your facial expressions speak books,
Look at the worlds you create!

I’m steady trying to find every face of this diamond
and at the same time,
Trying to relax and enjoy every second of our time
Striving not to parade desire like a torch fire;
And though we both know I don’t always meet that goal,
You show me grace.
Remind me that this ain’t a 100 yard race
And that tripping don’t disqualify when you’re running for miles.
I’ll just say I’m grateful you’ve chosen
To go the distance—
With me.
Happy 1-month anniversary, Eboni.


Photo taken by John Cuyugan

Healing Hurts.

…I must look pretty scary today, because everybody walking towards me on the sidewalk is suddenly inspired to move out of my way when they see me coming. I’ve been told that I look angry when I’m thinking, but I’m not angry. But when I think about it, it’s a difficult task to tell the difference between the facial expressions of someone who’s angry and someone who is badly injured. Continue reading